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May 26, 2006

School's Out

Today was the students' last day of school. It was nonstop from the time I woke up and shuffled our kids out the door by myself, since Duff is out of town. I really had a great year. I am glad that I decided to work this past year and get one more under my belt, but now I am ready to stay home a while. It feels like a maturing thing--I'm ready to take it on, and I see the need for it. Owen needs the structure and the deliberate attention, and Carly just looks at me like I'm the air she breathes (ya know I love it).
It just felt so strange today when the kids left. I got some gifts, some hugs, "I'll miss yous", and such, but then they were just gone. The year went so fast, and there goes another group of kids. I hope that I did good by them. Forever, I'll be their fourth grade teacher. That is one of the mystical things about teaching. "A teacher affects eternity. He can never tell where his influence stops."-Henry Adams. It's one of the things that keeps drawing me to it. I really have thought about teaching a lot over the past year, and Duffy and I have had some good discussions trying to come from all sides. My conclusions at the end are
-yes, it can make a difference,
no-we don't do it for the money, and
yes- I could do something else, lots of things, but this is what keeps calling me. The principal said some kind words about me at the fourth grade awards ceremony today, and announced that I wouldn't be teaching next year. It felt good to be recognized for my work. One of my goals is to be bring some respect back to the teaching profession.

By the way, Duff is in New York (and I want to be there so bad), some of our best friends just moved across the country, and today was my last day as a teacher for a while. Needless to say, I'm feeling melancholy. (thoughtful sadness, pensive meditation, depression of spirits).

Journal | By amy | 10:25 PM

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