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December 03, 2007
Figuring It Out (or not)
Beth is 7 weeks old today and I am definitely still in the adjustment period. I had NO idea how cRaZy it would be to have three little ones, all of whom still need their bums wiped by me. It all seemed so manageable when I had either my mother or mother-in-law here to help do all of the household stuff. HA! I did not have a clue what I was in for. Yesterday I had trouble seeing any humor or joy in the week ahead--all I felt was stress stress stress. Stress at the mere thought of trying to get them all dressed and out the door by myself. By the way, we were finally out the door by 11:00 this morning, and this feat took approximately 2 1/2 hours (and yes, I even put their clothes out the night before). The transportation part is the most difficult for me. In and out of the car and making sure everyone has everything they will need while we are out--and then when everyone is ready--actually getting to the car and on the road before someone needs a diaper change or the baby needs to be fed. And yet I still want so badly to keep my house clean, get the laundry done, and to make nutritious home-cooked meals (and to blog, make Christmas cookies, organize the kids' drawers, and write way-overdue thank-you notes). Did I mention that I'd also like to spend some semblance of quality time with the three little people that I live with, and their father too? Currently I am placing hope in my friend Ashlee's mom who is coming over Christmas. She had three children with almost the exact birth span as ours. She also, from what her daughter said, seems to have been able to get it all done-(quality time, clean house, dinners, organization)-so I am hoping to get every last bit of wisdom and advice from her that I can. Just knowing someone else has not only survived, but been "successful" at this gives me strength to keep holding on.
I also have come to a non-scientific conclusion that adding a second child adds to the total energy output somewhere between 50-100%, but that this is not the same for when a third child is added. With three is seems like there is some exponent at work and that the energy and work load for the parental figures does more than add what would be necessary for one child alone. Like the curve is at a steady incline, but when all the sudden there are three-WHAM!_ it shoots straight up. AND, let me add, for the record, that Bethany is the most low-maintenance easy-going child around--and I still find this "formula" to be true. Do you agree?
God must have a special dose of grace for mothers, please Lord, or I am a goner.
| By amy | 11:18 PM
Comments
Amy,
Your mom just gave me your blog site, and even given the fact that she may be a tad biased, you are a gifted writer.
How I remember the days you are describing! My children are all two years apart and I had the added fun of a working dairy farm at that time. The highlight of the year was haying season. After chores were done (6:00 AM), there was a hearty farm breakfast. Barn cleaning was done quickly and then the haying began. Haying is very labor intensive and it was my job to provide a midmorning meal (sandwiches, drinks), a noon meal, a mid afternoon snack, and then a hearty dinner. Honestly, I cooked from 5:45 AM-7:00 PM each day. At the time, it seemed like I would be exhausted forever and I was sure I wasn't doing a good job with my kids. Here's the funny part, they remember it as a wonderful, fun time and what a great family time it was. Sometimes just being there is really the best.
Have you heard of MOPS (Mothers of Pre-Schoolers)? I'm sure there's a chapter near you. It wasn't around when I was a young mother, but I know my daughter-in-law enjoys it tremendously. There is child-care at each meeting, a speaker or topic (for one meeting they put together boxes for Operation Christams Child), and a real support group for all.
Thanks for your terrific bolg.
Kathy
Posted by: Kathy Plumley at December 6, 2007 07:26 AM
Hey- surfed in on atlblogs. Enjoyed taking a peek into your world!
To your blog topic, I am reading "Reforming Marriage" by Doug Wilson, and in it, he has a really wonderful thought. He says that many mothers of little children may feel tired, (and therefore STRESSED!) and think this means they are doing everything wrong... when in fact, being tired means that you are doing many things RIGHT! At the end of the day, when you plop, exhausted, on the couch, remember that that is a sign of your obedience. You've accomplished a hard day's work, no wonder you're wiped out! Good job, Mama! :) Be encouraged by that.
It will get better... I have four, and that 3rd child was definitely the toughest adjustment. Just when you think you're at your breaking point though, things will start getting easier. Hang in there!
Will tune in for the next installment! :)
Posted by: WonderGirl at December 7, 2007 09:21 AM
